Online Vs. Face-to-Face Relationships

In class, we were asked to complete a survey to indicate what traits are most important to us in a person when forming a relationship. Soon after the completion of the survey, the issue arose of whether these traits can also apply to cyber, or online, relationships, and what is the difference between a cyber relationship, and a “real,” or face-to-face relationship. What are the benefits or disadvantages to these relationships, and can one really tell what a person is like without meeting them.

Before giving the topic much thought, I assumed that having an exclusively online relationship (no face-to-face communications) would be very dysfunctional. The reason I jumped to this conclusion is because with an online relationship, is it difficult to truly get to know a person. The person that you may be forming a relationship with is able to lie about even the most basic things about them such as their appearance, age, beliefs, occupation, and social interactions. All of these things are very possible to share via the internet, but can easily be falsified. In contrast, it is nearly impossible to lie about such traits in face-to-face relationships.

However, as I look all of the traits listed as important to me on the survey, I discover that many of them are difficult to discern even in a “real” relationship. For example, while it is easy to determine one’s age and appearance in a face-to-face relationship, it is usually impossible to know if a person is deceptive, jealous, unemotional, trusting, or supportive even when meeting them in person. If this is the case, then are face-to-face relationships really superior to cyber relationships? It seems that whether a relationship is online or in person it is still very difficult to truly get to know someone well enough to determine whether or not the relationship will be functional. While it may be a bit easier to be deceived in an online relationship, it is also very possible with face-to-face relationships.

This does not dismiss the other possible disadvantages to online relationships, such as a lack of personal contact, but it certainly is important to consider when comparing “real” and online relationships.